How to Temper Enthusiasm

I didn't realize I was such an enthusiastic being until recently, when I've really just had to take things down a notch and chill. It's hard. I'd rather do cartwheels in the parking lot of my complex any day than sit demurely with my legs crossed, nodding with very deliberate un-enthusiasm. But this is what I must do. I must quell the giddiness, stomp out the hopefulness and just wait things the fuck out. It's really for my own good, but I feel my heart becoming shrouded with a black sheer scarf when I take this approach. It's not living NOW and it's not conducive to my soul happiness. Yet is for my own good.

It's still important for me to express myself whenever it is "safe" to do so. I hate feeling stifled and careful. So when TSM asked if I would like to take my very first motorcycle ride yesterday, I almost jumped out of my shoes with enthusiasm!

I lowered my ponytail and slid a helmet on for the first time. As soon as it was on, I got nervous. I wondered if I looked like one of the bad ass chicks on Playstation Road Rash (probably not). I mounted the bike like the mechanical bull and gripped TSM's leather jacket pockets. I felt exposed, open, vulnerable and scared. But I trust TSM, and knew I was safe as long as I didn't do anything irrational as a nervous passenger.

We started out slow, and when we drove over a very small bump, I screamed and gripped his pockets. I think he was kind of laughing at me, but he asked if I was okay, and we drove up Pembroke Road. We got up to 45 mph (believe me, I kept a close eye) and after my muscles relaxed, I really started to enjoy the ride. TSM counseled me a bit on my "turn" behavior, and prepared me for upcoming turns. He has been riding since the age of 10 and is a confident, stable driver. I am glad he was my "first", because I never felt in danger or out of control.

At the end of the ride, I thought I really should have done this years ago! And what had I been afraid of? It was nothing but fun, and I would love to ride out somewhere for the day and just relax on the back of a bike.

When we got back, we discussed how my new thoughts on motorcycles opened up a whole new segment of the population I could date! It's nice to share enthusiasm with friends and I impulsively gave him a big hug to thank him for the experience.

I felt great the rest of the night (even with helmet hair) and I look forward to long rides in the future with someone special who not only likes, but encourages my enthusiasm!