Family members may want to skip this post. :-)
So although the little black book is closed forever, I have been tempted. Now, no one from that black book is anywhere close to being current boyfriend material. But there's like, two who could possibly meet other needs. One recently contacted me and I have to admit, I was tempted.
The other is someone who filled another position other than "boyfriend" for a few years. He wasn't qualified for the boyfriend position, but he proved himself very capable in another "position". He has not contacted me, but I've been getting some psychic vibes, so I may be on his mind. I can't entertain the thought of revisiting that scenario, because things got extremely emotional and messy at the end, on his side. I really don't need a replay of a man crying on my bedroom floor wondering why he can't have the promotion, when I had told him over and over that there really wasn't even a job opening in that position (there was, but he was highly unqualified).
Still, I know if he were to call, it would take some strength to just say no. Everyone has that one person they think back to that just rocked their world and made them feel for even just a few hours, that they were the most gorgeous creature on the face of the earth. Now if only I could find that in a man who is also capable of filling the main position of boyfriend!
What's kind of funny is one similarity between these two men. They're both bald and the main reason I was attracted to the one who just recently contacted me was because he looked kind of similar to the other in a certain position. It's the main reason I stuck around the more recent one. Man, am I a dude, or what.
I'm feeling a new one out (not Phil), but I'm not sure if this is something I should continue. I would really like to hold out for a great guy who can fulfill all of my needs, but to be realistic, I have no idea how long that will be. Maybe I will just let things happen instead of trying to make them happen. I really hate being in such a passive position, but it's probably time to try something new.
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5 comments:
Thanks Andy. You always know how to lift a sister up. Maybe when you're done chilling with the koalas and 'roos you can come chill with Ms. Sex-on-a-Stick, because I know it's not hard for you to make me feel that way!
Thanks for the "I told you so", Lee!
I don't regret going for round two, as I learned more about myself and some patterns that needed to be broken. This relationship did not bring out the best in me, and I'm now more able to define what I'm NOT looking for, whereas before I think I was more focused on what qualities I DID want. Someone can fulfill a lot of those, yet also add an unhealthy dose of things I don't want. So it was a learning experience.
just looking for a five letter word, but its not that simple. DANCE 360 Rules!!!!!!
Everyone has that one person they think back to that just rocked their world
and made them feel for even just a few hours, that they were the most gorgeous
creature on the face of the earth.
You are wrong. Not everyone has had the good fortune to experience such bliss.
Lucky are you to have had such a chance, and luckier still to entertain the
real possibility of experiencing it again. For even those who may have felt
that way but once in their lifetime, are only condemned to live out their days
in misery for the want of just one more joyful moment.
k thanks
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